The owner has just gotten a report card emailed to him from his 10 year old daughter's "Progressive" school,  an overpriced Montessori/French Immersion school for the presumably gifted children of wealthy and privileged parents.

It's one of those modern, fucked up affairs that rate everything from social interaction to abstract art, group play, and comparable vocabulary, there's easily 20 categories on it. And the grading, well, they've got they're own system, a series of colored buttons indicating the childs/prodigies progress in each area, there's a green button, yellow button, orange button and presumably (but not on this report card) a red button. But search as we may there's no key or legend on the report card, I look through it 2, 3 times.

And while the coloring is fairly intuitive, mapped, I imagine, after traffic lights, to the rich immigrant parent it's useless. He wants a description of the child's progress. A grade would be nice, swell even, but they don't do that anymore, numbers, people can figure those out, take offense, colors, well, that's a different story. 

Eventually we find it, the key, legend, it's embedded in the body of the email, you gotta scroll to find it, not on the attached accompanying report card. These are teachers, educated people, a minimum of a BA, what in the fuck were they thinking? And the key, it's what you'd expect, exactly, bigger words than a lot of parents can deal with but they're trying to make clear the distinction between they "The Educated Chaperones of Tomorrows Genius" and you, the uneducated fuckwit of a parent. And if you'd argue you weren't a fuckwit, think about it, you sent them to that school, didn't you?

And you think, at the end, why even the key, why not have the comments directly in the "grading" box, why bother with the color coding, a written assessment is what it translates to, do away with the references and fill it in. But they're educated and so infatuated with all this progressive bullshit that they've forgotten all common sense.