I'm doing a review for a restaurant, a fine restaurant, by the sounds of things, and I've found my way there but it's just an apartment run by an unfriendly Vietnamese woman. Drear, depressing, but it's supposed to have the best food going, she's bringing in supplies now, you need a reservation, there's a table set up - folding - in her hallway for 2 - but she's unpacking the food now...delivery just arrived...I make a reservation for later.

What she does, that makes her special, is she gilds her food. Wraps it in 24K gold foil. For this restaurant, that's the hook. It's famous.

I'm back later, when they open, her apartment is now busy, folding tables and chairs set up everywhere. The food comes out, it's just ordinary food. Chicken wings and such. We - my date and I - drink mineral water and a couple of glasses of wine. I'm worried about how much this will cost. My date, she's loving it, me, it's just food. And I can't see the gold leaf anywhere, and am too shy to ask. I'm getting paranoid that I'll be called into work - my own restaurant job - and whether I'll be able to pay for this all...

The bill comes...lots of charges, the bottled water was $60 per bottle, lots of other charges, expensive, I'm not sure I have this in the bank, going to pay the bill, meanwhile my date is smacking her lips and telling me how good it was...I'm thinking it was overrated.