Now I'd heard this, that you should safely presume your phone is always listening to you.

And I'd had some evidence, as for example a few weeks ago I was humming/singing "Pretty Women..." from Sweeny Todd, and then - to my surprise, it turned up on my YouTube recommendations. 

To be sure, I checked my history, no evidence that I'd listened to it for a very long time. And you could say "Coincidence" but I am skeptical, more that just as the internet absorbs local cues and surfing habits to tailor your content, but spies upon you by listening as well...

I wonder what keywords I'd need to be speaking out loud to bring the FBI to my door?

Which is kind of funny, because I went to use the microphone on my phone a week or so ago and to do so I had to enable all sorts of permissions that by default are turned off.

I think we're long past the point where this is paranoia, this is simply reality. 1984. 

And, on a more humorous note, all that time looking at inane Facebook videos has resulted in me getting ads promising to treat my adult ADHD...