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J & Girlfriend
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- Written by: Rod Boyle
- Category: People
- Hits: 1805
Now J is a friend of the owners, we tip him out as an equal even though he has no experience as a server. He has some common sense and is eager to help out, that's enough.
He works weekends, or whenever we need him, he's a good guy. His day job he works for Telus, but - close to my age - his bills are paid, his children raised, he's successful in his fashion, he works at the restaurant to help out his friend but something's missing.
It's love.
He's divorced, the particulars are nasty and we don't ask, it's a long story, he'd be happy to share it but we know better.
But, more to the point, he's a current flame that's walking all over him, and this hurts, not just himself but all of us.
He tells us the stories, keeps us updated as to the status, even cynical and derisive me, our advice is always the same.
He's close to my age, perhaps 40 something (early forties) - good looking, 6'1" or so, buff, short curly blonde hair, professionally attired, most women would consider him a catch. He's a slight nervous tic, irregular, somehow it makes him more endearing. He's religious, attends church on Sundays, but not preachy religious, it's his own thing.
I respect that.
But his girlfriend.
We've had all the stories, even served them before he started here to help us out. His girlfriend's a bitch.
At that time we said nothing, not our place, but you could tell. The girls especially.
She's a bit older than him, 46 or so, fit, good looking, youthful, but she's got him on a string like a yo-yo.
Somehow or another he's gotten into her bad books, some months ago, and she's told her children, her friends, what a bad guy he is.
It's not true, we know him as well. He's a good guy. A trifle boring perhaps, but a good guy nonetheless.
They've dated for almost 2 years, he's hopelessly in love. But they've had problems, he's attended - at her bequest - "Anger Management" counseling. Nothing could be more absurd. And they've seen therapists - at his expense - still the relationship falls apart.
He has her passwords, works in IT after all, knows all her email passwords, computer stuff, knows her intimate private life, it cuts him to the quick.
He took her to Mexico, a platonic vacation, caught her writing emails to her children telling them she'd decided to break up with him.
She hadn't told him, wanted to wait for the vacation to end.
He's bought her children laptops - Apple, as that's the brand, paid for their medical expenses, Dental, schooling, still they don't like him. Mom's said he's a bastard, it must be true.
He bought her an engagement ring, $24,000 dollars worth, she broke up with him and kept it, was going to sell it to buy a car...
He bought her a car, Mercedes, for her to use while she helped him set up his business, it wasn't good enough.
And they go on dates and he hacks into her email and discovers her profile on E-Harmony, she hasn't told him, she's off dating other men.
***
He's in love and doesn't know what to do, he begs our advice and then discards it, it's always the same.
I feel for him. I know - too well, his situation. Not that I've blighted lovers with gifts of $24, 000 engagement rings or Mercedes Benzes, but I know that feeling of love that defies reason, that when everything is so obviously wrong I've still pursued it.
You might say I'm a bit of an expert in failed romances. Not to my credit, to be sure, but - like anyone not in the situation, the symptoms, the outcome, is apparent.
I talk to him. I tell him there's no way she'll ever recant the lies she's told her family, children, he's doomed. That we've all seen them together, met her., that everything, heck anything he's told us about her is enough to persuade us that it's going nowhere fast.
He's dejected, he's heard this countless times before. Everyone he's told this story to has given him the same answer. But I, I feel specially qualified to address this, I've more experience in failure than anyone can shake a stick at. Truly, no doubt. And this is going nowhere.
I tell him to busy himself with work, if not Telus then here, the restaurant, Not to date, it will put him at her level. Don't talk to her, if you have to because she's called you keep it pleasant but explain you're busy and have to go. Easy advice to give, but damned tough to follow.
Give up her passwords, let her know he has them, let her change them, obsessively stalking her is a bad thing. Damn I know that one.
And keep busy. With work, the church, things important to him. In time - how much? I can't say. Years even. But in time she'll disappear. Meanwhile I just want to hug him, tell him he's a good, no - a great guy, and one day he'll find someone who appreciates him.
Nephew & Marvin
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- Written by: Rod Boyle
- Category: People
- Hits: 1771
The Nephew has lost his cat, Marvin.
Marvin was an indoor cat who somehow got out in the past couple of days and hasn't been seen or heard from since.
He's upset. He loved Marvin.
I try to console him, lightly as is my nature, with an offer of one of my cats, but he won't hear of it, he's busy calling the SPCA and posting up flyers in his neighborhood.
Now when he describes his loss it seldom centers on the cat. Marvin, yes, he was a good cat, but more important was the Christmas outfit he had ordered for him from Italy, $300.00 he spent, he was going to dress Marvin as Santa Clause and the dog and other pet (??? I don't know) as elves.
The costumes, they're nothing without the players expected to wear them.
And so I offer again my cats, either one, he can have his pick, and as the days pass and Marvin fails to show up he's considering it....
Barred
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- Written by: Rod Boyle
- Category: People
- Hits: 1665
Yet another customer barred on Friday, a regular asshole, pleasant enough to me, but I'm not the only one that works there.
A certain famous - in a Calgary sort of way - individual, who's son has done well in Politics. He works for the city, or some such.
According the Nephew and other sources he's been barred from quite a few other restaurants in the city. He knows this, in his year and a half here he's gotten quite well connected.
The reason is that he's had the audacity to complain about his steak, it's overdone, he's right but G "bought" him a half litre of wine in compensation and offered to replace it.
The steak and wine sufficed, he seemed (as it were) happy enough.
He's in with his secretary, attractive, 30-something, shapely, the female staff have informed me that they're having an affair, me, I have trouble ascribing it, the customer in question is perhaps 55, 60, short, in feature and manner a toad.
Still, who am I to comment? Stranger things have happened. At lunch they hammer the wine, in the evening when he brings his wife and other guests they are quiet, drink only water. He, like so many others, has a very apparent double life. I don't comment.
He complains after lunch about being charged for his steak (overdone, it's true) and the charge for the substitution on his side dish of Pasta.
I don't argue, am not generally the argumentative type, I have a suspicion how this will pan out but just deduct it from the bill. G dealt with him, G's gone home, I don't need the hassle.
When G comes in for the night shift I tell him, the owner's near and goes off his nut, never particularly liked this customer (none of the staff did either), more grievances, who does he think he is? And he has me compose a letter on the computer, Mr. So and SO is no longer welcome here, he's been barred.
It's happened before.
Now again. We bar people with disconcerting regularity, relying on staff to remember who's been barred and who hasn't, the owner, he doesn't forget. Usually we're so thrilled to see the end of these ass-holes we remember.
The thing about being barred from this restaurant, as opposed to any other restaurant (and I can't help wondering how failed your life must be to be barred from here, let alone another restaurant....to think some people are regular at this?!!!) is that so many of our regular customers know one another that in a way, peculiar and obtuse that you will understand or not, you've been barred from society.
Almost all of our regular customers know one another.
How, then, to explain that you can't join a friend or wife for lunch at a favorite dining spot? DO you just say you're not hungry, on a diet, do you state that you've had a disagreement with the owner (as with so many other local owners/proprietors)? Do they feel any sort of shame and embarrassment? As far as I'm concerned he wasn't the worst customer by far, the competition for that place is vigorous and ongoing, but this customer had the audacity to complain about 2 things on the bill, and that was socially the end of him.
We don't so badly need the business. He's been barred.
Work
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- Written by: Rod Boyle
- Category: Miscellany
- Hits: 2041
Friday, busy, Saturday, Crazy.
We're fully booked, with flips, nothing fixed but we're hoping that customers leave in an hour so that others can be sat.
We're not the sort of restaurant where you plan to be in and out within an hour or two.
I've brought in pedometers for all the staff, want to track how many steps each of them take each night, it's lighthearted but I'm aiming to prove that some are definitely a lot less valuable than others.
The new waiter, M I'll call him, he really doesn't need a pedometer, he needs a odometer for the wheelchair that J pushes him about in, but in the interests of not offending anyone (or offending everyone equally) I've gotten him one as well.
They take it in good stride, figure out how they work, attach them to their belts or waistbands, and the night begins.
***
The night, it goes off pretty much as expected, it's crazy busy, the staff - mostly support apart from G, disappear the moment things get busy, reappear a couple of hours later when it's cooled a bit. We have the demon table from hell, a regular who's family is in from Montreal to wish him happy-important-birthday, they've imposed all sorts of financial restraints on the party, in the end 24 people spend what 3 or 4 tables of 4 would have spent without their patronage, they tip badly and stay until 1:30 AM. getting far too drunk and ignoring all subtle cues to get the fuck out.
It's a long night.
***
The end of the night, all the staff sitting down, a couple still serving the party from hell, most relaxing, the pedometers having proven a poor measure of worth, J has figured out how to shake them and rack up 10, 000 steps in a minute or two, the competition is off. A drunken native walks in off the street, wants us to call a cop car to take him to the lock up, won't leave unless we do, he refuses to go outside, it's too cold.
He's right.
And so the staff go through the motions of calling imagined friends and relatives, he provides us numbers, the party, they're shocked, they want to pay his cab to wherever he wants to go, he isn't going anywhere. What cabbie would pick him up?
I call the police,
It's an automated machine, not 911, this isn't an emergency, rather the local line, but I have to push buttons through 3 minutes of options before I get a live operator, another 10 minutes answering questions before they send out a car....
The party, most have never seen anything like this, they want to give him money, buy themselves a clear conscience, I try to explain, to him the police are cab drivers and the drunk tank's a warm hotel, like the Regency or Hyatt, they don't really understand.
Eventually the police come, take him away, the customers reluctantly leave, it's 1:30 AM. A long night. Come Xmas every night will be like this, December will be a long month. But 3 weeks yet before I need to worry about that.
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