Now I get these emails all the time, promising to help me to optimize my website so I'm highly visible to all the search engines and #1 in search results related to me. I didn't think I was doing so bad, when I search for me I come up #1 for Rod Boyle and #3 for Rod's Blog, but I shouldn't let it go to my head. I can do better.
I mean, it's #1 out of about 1,550,000 results, most of which have nothing to do with me, and if I put quotes about my name I'm #1 out of about 6,580 results, most of which have nothing to do with me but it's still something, although no great shakes.
If I changed my name to something like "Augustus Cervantes Diablo Boyle" I could be the #1 and only, which would be good, but a lot of people would just end up searching for "Augustus Boyle" and I'd be back down in the rankings again, so there's really no point.
What would I want to be #1 at anyways? Maybe "Artist". That would be good, type in Art or Artist or Genius or Writer or Literature or F. Scott Fitzgerald, and have me come in at #1.
Sex would also be good. I'd pay to be the #1 thing people see, think and/or imagine when they search for sex.
But do you know what would be better? I mean, the above, I could work on the site in that direction and sooner or later I might actually get there, but there's something I'm not sure about. What if I wanted to be #1 for the search word "Google"? That would be worth paying for. People search for "Google" and the first thing they see is me. Then I'd know I'd made it. Next time I get an email offering to maximize my site for the keywords I choose I'm going to ask to be #1 for Google and see how much they'll charge.