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- Written by: Rod Boyle
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So, downsizing, trying to get through the mountains of stuff the boy dragged into the house.
Stuff to the Antique shop. This week, candlesticks, an antique typewriter. There will be more, lots more.
Then there were the letters. First of all the paper material the kids acquired in their school years, achievements, diaries. These are not mine, I cannot get rid of them, so I open an old suitcase and find it filled with hundreds of letters. Quite literally hundreds. Postcards, old photos, people I'd long forgot, people I can't - despite me, remember.
I thought I had destroyed all these letters, a long time a go when I dated a certain Lorna who would stay at home reading letters from an ex and getting crazy and making me crazy as well. But I only destroyed the letters from her and life went on and more friendships were made and hundreds of other letters were sent and received.
Somewhere or another I lost touch with all of them, I look at all the addresses I had, London, several, Prague, - one, and a landlady that stole the mail so she could censure it, she was nosy, trying to sabotage any friendships I might have kept up...
Then Calgary, and the half dozen or so addresses there.
I look at the letters briefly, ex girlfriends, from Anna who has immaculate cursive writing, that of the student getting her fingers rapped by nuns, there was Kirk - squatmate, Sean-Planter, Sneh-co-worker in Calgary, Maeve - Planter, Iskra - Flatmate in London, Mary, Co-worker London, Brian, Co-worker London, Jennifer, a dozen others....
I looks some of them up. Dinah, an old co-worker who maintained a fine flirtation when I travelled abroad, find her online and MY GOD I RECOGNIZE HER! She looks - virtually the same. Age, yes, but not unkind. Kirk, I find him, a voiceover actor, campaigner for men's mental health. Iskra, blacked out now on Facebook, some movie credits, Sean, a Therapist based out of Kelowna, Debbie, (had forgotten) - now a molecular biologist/scientist in Israel, quite high up, Dana - and who, exactly, is Dana, and I read the letter, can't place how I knew her, where we met...
Others I can find nothing on. Vanished, in the days of the internet and Facebook and somehow they found a way to slip through a crack and vanish from the earth...
It makes me happy to see that these people from your past have done well. Of course, you don't know, but I suspect most of them have. They look well in their fields and their photos.
The people you know, have letters from, have never seen again, somewhere in the mid 90’s letters stopped, a move too far, change of address with no forwarding address or perhaps the relationships had run their course
Postcards from Kirk in Jakarta, erotic letters from ex's, (before sexting was a thing you had to commit it to paper), an invitation to an ex's wedding which I missed because I was living abroad...photographs, negatives, postcards, Valentines, etc, etc, all these to be gone through and sorted, destroyed, one wants to somewhat curate one's past, life.
The days, these days of late, cloaked in rain and mist.
This will be a gold mind, there's inspiration aplenty, to rework and shape and reorder the meaning and - while it's trauma going back through it it is also - well, I like mixed media, the stamps, air-mail envelopes, cards, there are infinite possibilities and I have a few ideas....
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- Written by: Rod Boyle
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This morning, up early, trip to the dentist and I'm winded. My chest heavy and I'm coughing up sputum and I'm wondering if the Pneumonia really did go away.
It could be allergies, though, and so that's the thinking I use to get through the day.
The dentist, 2 hours in the chair, cleaning, fluoride, etc, when they tip me back up past level it takes me a few minutes to gain my equilibrium. The dentist, drills, jets, it's all a zen activity in being somewhere else, just checked out enough I don't know what's happening...
The rest of the day, tired, winded with trifling activities and it feels as if my blood has congealed to molasses. But evening and I'm a little better, time to give up on the latest movies/miniseries, mostly if not largely all shit, and get back to my books. Better company there by far.
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And finally, 3 weeks later there are 2 "sprouts" on my window ledge. The Carolina Reapers, of 10 seeds bought and paid for, 8 arrived, and just this week, a couple of days ago, 2 of them sprouted. First one, one day, then the next another. The other pots show no signs of life.
***
Work, sleep, boring, boring. I've promised myself a Jeep come month end, a necessity of summer, for my mental health, but given the erratic pay-periods of this job (1 week already past last pay date, and 3 weeks tips due back) I'm not sure how to commit. I will figure it out - but there are questions...
***
And the fudge, from the neighbour I'd fed steak, that mystery at least solved, and she seemed pleased to have given me it; or at least been acknowledged for it...
***
Cleaning, the inspection this month. The bedroom, more or less, cleaned. I could go deeper, into the closet, there are a number of things I need to be rid of, old computer, monitor, an abundance of clothes I never wear that should now be moved on. And my necktie collection, some 500+ ties, where to get rid of these? The kitchen/main living area, I took an hour and cleaned off the bar-island, moved candlesticks, rocks, to other settings, unboxed some puppets (NJ) and untangled them somewhat and hung them, one on the easel, the other off a candlestick on a shelf. These things inspire me.
The living room, the last big mess, piles of canvases, art supplies, mixed media, that need some order, arrangement, and where to begin? Where to begin? It doesn't matter, I've come far enough there isn't much left...
***
And that is where I am at the moment. Watching a new miniseries - "The Peacekeeper", some comic-book inspired drivel, superhero stuff, with John Cena as the "Peacekeeper", good, for what it is, but I have no clue, I've never referenced the source material, not a Superhero fan, but this is I suspect better drivel than most.
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Which I found after work and took it in and scarfed all down. Delicious, I sent a text to the upstairs neighbour thanking her, whom I figured it was responsible, made up a bowl of coconut-curry soup to share, gave it to her in the same bowl, she returned it the next day, apparently it wasn't her bowl, and - It could be the other neighbour I fed last week, but - well, even when I run into her we seldom chat, same planet, different worlds, and so I'm a little stumped as to where to return this bowl...
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Sorting out the boxes of photographs to best fit them into the apartment. It's overwhelming, boxes stuffed to overflowing, and I swear, 40 years of taking pictures and only started taking "good" (not great) pictures when the children were born.
By good I mean that sort of staged photography you get at a high-school graduation.
A lot of travel photographs, from living in London, Prague, Visits to Kathmandu, Japan, Tangiers, Spain.
Too many. They take up real estate, and it's time they go. There's a few good ones, most are rubbish. How many thousands of dollars wasted on taking photos, buying film, developing, now to all head to the trash. And hours spent sorting them out, no cheery-memory lane sort of stuff, just-too many.
Then there's the antiques, the gun-sight (WW1), the compass (WW2), vintage bowls, knick-knacks, candlesticks (don't get me started!!!) - something's gotta give. Too-Much-Stuff.
I cart a couple of loads to the antique shop, I'm gonna need multiple loads, and there's more - always more. This is not the place to sell them, and I haven't the time for Facebook Marketplace, the Antique Shop, they're planning on retiring, they're reluctant to take anything and I'll take a bath - for sure, but - there's no place for it, and I've hung on to it all long enough.
And this is where I am at the moment, letting it all go, bit-by-bit, piece by piece...